John Oliver at The Daily Show made some excellent points regarding the reactions to the 5-4 decision by the US Supreme Court. In fact, he noted that Senator Rand Paul must be dating Senate Minority Leader Mitch “Senior Mutant Turtle” McConnell. After all, why would Paul be so obsessed with the whole animal sex thing. In fact, it seems like Republicans were more than obsessed with comparing sex with animals to homosexuality.
In the first segment of “America Comes Out of the Closet”, Oliver, who is substituting for Jon Stewart, went after Justice Antonin Scalia for his use of the legalese term “argle-bargle.” In fact, Oliver pointed out that scholars for centuries to come will be wondering whether or not Scalia was scuba diving while dictating his dissent:
Meanwhile, Congressional Republicans were going ape poo over the whole thing. In fact, they were being far angrier than a sack full of orangutans over the whole issue, and yes, they were talking about sex with animals. For those who wonder when people will be allowed to marry their dogs, we have only one thing to say- unless your dog has the ability to talk and understand English and hold a pen to sign the ****ing contract, then I don’t see a time in the near future where you will be allowed to marry your dog.