So you just finished your eye exam or arrived at the mall’s sunglasses boutique and you are now scanning the room for that perfect sexii pair of frames that compliment your face in all the right places as well as show off all of your delicious features. Your first thoughts are probably something along the lines of “So many shapes, so many colors, Where the heck do I start?!” @__@ Not to worry my dears I am going to break down this whole Glasses search into a step by step guide on how to find the perfect frames for your face.

Step 1: Find Your Face Shape

In order to find your face shape you’re going to have to be vain for a few minutes and admire your gorgeous self in the mirror hee hee. If you have long hair pull it back in a tight bun or ponytail so that you can examine the outline of your face, if you have short hair you may want to wet your hair or take a shower first to make finding your face shape a little easier.

Face Shapes

The Square Face: Mainly made up of right angles. Generally it’s as long as it is wide with a prominent jaw line and broad cheekbones giving a square like appearance.

The Oval Face: For the most part is exceptionally proportional, with a chin that is only slightly narrower than the forehead and typically has a higher cheekbone structure.

The Heart Face: Tends to be broader on top with a wide forehead and cheekbones that taper down to a narrow chin.

The Round Face: Has beautiful full cheeks and tends to be as long as it is wide. No prominent angles and is made up of curvilinear lines.

The Oblong Face: Narrow shape that’s longer than it is wide. Angular features with high cheekbones

The Triangle Face: Has a narrow forehead that widens at the cheeks and chin.

The Diamond Face: Is small/ narrow at the forehead and chin with high dramatic cheekbones.

Now ladies if your face doesn’t seem to dramatically fit one of these face shapes figure out where your wide points are and find the shape you think is the best fit

Step 2: Finding what works for your face

Now that we know what shape our faces are we need to know what frame shapes work for us. We want our Glasses to compliment our best features after all J and our glasses should play against our facial contours. For example if your face is on the boxie side you would be best staying away from a hard lined rectangle frame, Instead something rounded at the bottom will soften up the angles of the face giving it a smoother appearance and taking away attention from the jaw line. Same thing with colors, If you have brown eyes it may be best not to pick frames that match your eye color instead choose a color that will compliment your eyes like going a shade lighter.

Square Faces

Glasses: We want our glasses to contrast the features of our faces. So for my ladies with gorgeous square shaped faces you’ll be looking for frames that soften those strong sexii angles, giving a little bit of a round appearance to those straight lines.

What Works

• Curved bottom rims
• Bold upper edges divert attention away from chin and jaw line
• Round or Oval frame
• Curved narrow styles
• Subtle rimless frames with soft edges add contrast and visual interest to a strong, square face

What to Avoid

• Flat / straight bottoms will mirror the image of the face giving it a harsher appearance.
• Thick square/rectangle frames make square faces look boxie

Sunglasses: Much like with eye glasses when you pick your fabulous sunwear you’re looking for frames that soften your jaw line and compliment your amazing features. Following the guidelines for glasses with a few add-ons will lead you to the perfect movie star sunglasses <3

What Works

• Big Fabulous slightly rounded / round frames seem to be a perfect fit
• A nice thin frame with rounded bottom rims
• Lenses that fade from dark at the top to light at the bottom help down play a strong jaw line
• Frames that have more width than depth
• Aviators

What to Avoid

• Square/rectangle Frames

Oval Faces

Glasses: Lucky for my Oval ladies you have a wide variety of frames and styles to choose from, Because of your proportionate faces almost every frame is The Frame for you.

What Works

• Most
• It is recommended to look for frames which are wider (or as wide as) the broadest part of your face.

What to Avoid

• People with oval faces often have smaller features, so make sure your frames are in proportion and don’t overpower your face
• Ultracircular Frames

Sunglasses: Anything you find Fabulous should do just fine

What Works

• Same as Eye Glasses

What to Avoid

• None

Heart Faces

Glasses: My wonderful heart shaped girlies have interesting proportions, we’re looking to down play the wide forehead and narrow chin so we want to contrast with frames that even out those heart shaped features.

What Works

• Butterfly / Cat’s eye
• Rimless
• Round

What to Avoid

• Frames that are dramatic or decorative at the top of the frame
• Wide tops with thinner bottoms

Sunglasses: Sunglasses for my heart shaped chicas should be like the eyeglasses, draw attention away from the narrow chin and wide forehead.

What Works

• Softly Curved
• Wrap arounds
• Rounded upper corners
• Square bottoms
• Aviators

What to Avoid

• Circular
• Square frames

Round Faces

Glasses: Round face lezzies want their glasses to give their face a longer, slimmer appearance. Round faces have very soft curves and few angles and since a balanced face is always best we’re looking for angular frames to sharpen and add definition.

What Works

• Inclined Frames (butterfly, Cat eye)
• Rectangle Frames
• On the narrower side
• Angular
• Bold Frames

What to Avoid

• Circular
• Frames that are more vertical than horizontal
• Rimless

Sunglasses: Rounded faces are looking for sunglasses that will make the face appear thinner and less circular.

What Works

• Big Rectangles/squares
• Bold frames
• Decorative temple pieces
• Straight top with curved bottoms

What to Avoid

• Circular
• Thin frames
• Rimless

Oblong Faces

Glasses: oblong faces are much like an extended oval. If you have an oblong face you’re looking for you glasses to give your face a slightly shorter appearance as well as add a little width.

What Works

• Tall Vertical Frames
• Broad
• Accented tops
• Decorative temple pieces

What to Avoid

• Small Horizontal Frames
• Short Frames
• Narrow Rims

Sunglasses: For your sunglasses you’re going to want frames that fill the center of your face by down playing the length.

What Works

• Deep Frames
• Embellishments on temple pieces

What to Avoid

• Frames that extend the widest part of the face
• Short
• Narrow
• Small

Triangle Faces

Glasses: If you’re one of my triangle faces girls you’re going to want your glasses to deemphasize your wide chin and narrow forehead. Finding a frame that gives the top of your face some width and making the jaw line narrow out would be ideal.

What Works

• Square
• Cat Eyes
• Metal Frames with rimless bottoms
• Thin Rimmed Frames
• Semi-rimless
• Bottom frame angled inward

What to Avoid

• Narrow out of proportion frames
• Low-set temple pieces

Sunglasses: Your sunglass criteria are going to be the same as with your eyeglasses. You’re looking to Widen the forehead and soften the jaw line.

What Works

• Thick Square Frames
• Semi-rimless

What to Avoid

• Over sized sunglasses

Diamond Faces

Glasses: For diamond lesbians we want our glasses to highlight the cheekbone structure and enhance the eyes. The frames should draw more attention to our Gorgeous eyes and avert attention from the thin forehead and jawline. It’s all about proportions so you’ll be looking to balance all of your fabulous features and bring them together to make the perfect smart and sexxi look.

What Works

• Square
• Curved Bottom Frame
• Slightly curved
• Softly curved square
• Rimless
• Decorative / Dramatic top frame

What to Avoid

• Frames that are wider than cheekbones
• Narrow Frames

Sunglasses: When it comes to sunglasses diamond ladies are looking for a frame to fill the center of the face and soften the cheekbones, drawing attention away from the harsh contour of a diamond face. Not too over whelming but a delicate balance to even out that facial scale

What Works

• Oval Sunglasses
• Curved bottoms
• Aviators
• Rimless
• Softly Curved Square Frames
• Ray Bands
• Decorative Top Frame

What to Avoid

• Frames that are wider than the broadest parts of your face

Following these guidelines should make finding the perfect pair of shades or sexii specs way more fun and manageable then going in unprepared and it’s always a good idea to go shopping for these hard to buy items with your very best friends!! Get lots of opinions and make sure that you’re comfortable with your decision always remember ladies that the most important part of any fashionable look is being confident. No matter what frames you decide to buy make sure they make you feel like the super star that you are. Good Luck Girlies!!

Love,

KitCat
Fashion, Express yourself <3

One Tree Hill star and Chad Michael Murry ex Sophia Bush is boycotting Urban Outfitters. Bush is upset over a shirt the company is selling that says “Eat Less,” the actress is outraged that they would promote anorexia so blatantly. Bush wrote an open letter to the store to raise awareness of the problem.

“I have been a supporter of your store for many years, but now I’m through.”

“I am fortunate enough to star on a wonderful TV show called One Tree Hill. I play a fashion designer named Brooke Davis, who started a campaign on the show called “Zero Is Not A Size” and the outpouring of love and gratitude that came my way from girls and women ALL OVER THE WORLD (sic) who have body image issues brought me to tears.”

“To promote starvation? To promote anorexia, which leads to heart disease, bone density loss, and a slew of other health problems, not least of all psychological issues that NEVER go away? Shame on you. I will no longer be shopping at your stores. And I will encourage the tens of thousands of female supporters I have to do the same. I have fought to boycott BP. I never imagined I would also be boycotting affordable fashion.”

“You should issue a public apology, and make a hefty donation to a women’s organisation that supports those stricken with eating disorders. I am sickened that anyone, on any board, in your gigantic company would have voted ‘yes’ on such a thing, let alone enough of you to manufacture an item with such a hurtful message. It’s like handing a suicidal person a loaded gun. You should know better.”

“I sincerely hope that next time you decide that making fun of serious issues is comedic, or ’snarky in a cool way’, that you re-think your decision.”

[Source]

Due to the controversy, Urban Outfitters has removed the shirt from their website and hopefully, from their stores. This is not the first time Bush has shown her socially responsible side, she recently visited the Gulf Coast to survey the damage done by the BP Oil Spill and help raise awareness and donations to the clean up efforts. How awesome is she? I’m totally down to boycott Urban Outfitters. I had no plans to wear a lace bra top or tee shirts with ironic sentiments on it this summer anyway

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Take Note America

Locally businesses in D.C. are taking note;  of the fact that gay and lesbian couples are coming in droves to D.C. to marry.  From wedding ring collections to wedding planners, the market is set to explode, according to Forbes Magazine from $70 Billion per year by another $16 Billion.

D.C. Marriage office currently has a waiting list to June 2010.

Gay couples should have these rights in all the STATES of the USA.  Just think what the other States are missing out on.  Only 5 States and D.C. currently allow Gay marriage

This Video is a great reflection – This type of  industry boost is critically important to note because the more one sees of two women in bridal gowns atop a cake, the more acceptable that visual will become to mainstream America.

Mazeltov D.C.

4-20-10- Melanie Nathan; The Women’s Conference® community is a global network of women who gather every year at the nation’s premier forum for women, hosted by California First Lady Maria Shriver and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. For two full days, more than 100 internationally-acclaimed leaders, visionaries, authors, journalists and artists come together with more than 25,000 women from all walks of life to be educated, inspired and empowered to be Architects of Change in their own lives, within their communities and around the world.

Beyond the annual event, The Women’s Conference community gathers daily online at www.WomensConference.org and throughout the year at events that serve, support and strengthen the larger community. The mission of The Women’s Conference is to create Architects of Change – people who see a problem and seek to create the solution, be it in their homes, their communities, their states or the world.

The Women’s Conference has become a “must attend” transformational event and full day passes sell out in record-breaking time each year. In 2009, tickets sold out in less than two hours. In response to this surging popularity and demand, The Conference expanded the event to two full days with the addition of A Day of Transformation and Night at The Village.

May 14-16:      I Can Do It! San Diego Conference

The Mind, Body & Soul Retreat featuring dozens of your favorite speakers including Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, Marianne Williamson, Cheryl Richardson, Joan Z. Borysenko, Ph.D., Louise L. Hay, and many more workshops ranging from health to spirituality.

• San Diego Convention Center

For more information visit www.icandoit.net or call 800-654-5126

June 9:     The Women’s Conference Press Announcement

Two weeks prior to registration, The Women’s Conference 2010 announces conference events, speakers & ticket information. Information will be available at www.womensconference.org.

June 23:    The Women’s Conference 2010 Online Ticket Registration

(Please note: Date is subject to change.)

To learn more about The Women’s Conference 2010, click HERE.

**Check out The Great Giveaway for a chance to win 2 free Special Guest Passes to The Women’s Conference 2010.

September 10-12:    Best Buddies Challenge

JOIN TEAM MARIA on a cycling adventure along the Pacific Coast Highway from Carmel to the Hearst Castle in San Simeon, which also includes an optional 5K & 3K walk. For more information, click HERE.

October 10:     Pier del Sol

JOIN US at a family festival & fundraiser for Special Olympics, Southern California

• Santa Monica Pier & Pacific Park
• 10am – 2pm

October 25-26:     The Women’s Conference 2010

The Nation’s Premier Forum for Women

• A Day of Health, Wellness & Transformation and Night at The Village – Oct. 25
• A Day of Empowerment & The Minerva Awards – Oct. 26
• Long Beach Convention Center
• To learn more about The Women’s Conference 2010, click HERE.

**Check out The Great Giveaway for a chance to win 2 free Special Guest Passes to The Women’s Conference 2010.

December 7:    Season of Giving Event – Sacramento

The Women’s Conference supports a statewide holiday food drive and tree lighting event.

• California State Capitol, Sacramento

December 14:    California Hall of Fame Event – Sacramento

To honor legendary people who embody California’s innovative spirit.

• The California Museum, Sacramento
• Visit www.californiamuseum.org

MARK YOUR CALENDARS!

The Women’s Conference 2010

October 25 & 26

Posted by Melanie Nathan

from Site of Womens Conference

Picture was provided by 1stbras.com

Okay lets talk foundations. Girls are always asking me, how do you feel about this shirt? What about these pants? Does this color look good with my complexion? Those are very good questions ladies however, What about the garments that go underneath the cutest shirt you’ve ever seen in your life? Lets talk Boobies Ladies!! O:) it is estimated that around 80% of women are actually wearing the wrong size bra! This is so important girls, not only is it detrimental to your health but it can also make or break that perfect low cut top you’re so excited about sporting and for my masculine ladies the right bra with that sexii button down can make a world of difference.

Before we talk fashion lets talk about health. The majority of women don’t know that wearing the wrong bra can cause a series of health issues including chronic headaches, back pain, tingling sensation in the arms, restricted breathing, abrasions, rashes and breast pain! Oh my gosh is that not just horrible!? So wearing the wrong sized bra is not only very obviously uncomfortable but it’s also bad for your body! It’s very hard to be a sexii, vibrant and confident woman when your body is painful and unsupported. But how can you tell if you’re wearing the wrong size bra? Lucky for you girlies I’ve already made a list for you

How to tell if you’re wearing the wrong size:

• Do the ta tas fit?  If your ta tas are spilling over the top or sides of your bra then your bra is too small. You may need to go up a cup or band size.
• Does the center of your bra comfortably sit in the middle of your breastbone? The right size bra should fit snuggly and the center should rest right on your breastbone.
• Does the band on your bra ride up your back? The band of your bra should stay centered around your ribcage underneath your shoulder blades.
• Do your bra straps fall down or dig into your shoulders? If your bra straps slip down your arms then your bra may be too big or it might just be time for a new bra. Straps tend to stretch as the bra becomes worn out. You should replace your bras ideally every 4 – 6 months. If your bra straps are digging into your shoulders your bra may not be big enough to support your large breasteses.
• Does your band feel loose around your ribcage? Your band like the cups themselves should fit snuggly. When you buy a bra you should find one that is snug while fastened on the end hook. Bras stretch over time and following this rule extends the life and comfort of your bra. If it’s snug on the end hook, when it stretches you can move on to a shorter hook to make the band tighter.
• Is your bust in the right place? The right bra is supposed to support you. Your bust should be lifted and feel light on your chest. The cup should be holding up your bust and fit snuggly to your chest.

So we went through the list and lets just say you now know that you’re wearing the wrong size bra 0___0 Don’t worry ladies KitCat has you covered There are many different methods for finding your perfect bra size but remember girls that our breasts are all shaped differently so measuring to find a size does not substitute for trying on the bra. Every bra fits an individual differently. Measuring to find a size just gives you a place to start, whether or not it fits depends on how it feels to your body.  (Having someone else measure you will give you a more accurate result than measuring yourself.)

Finding your Band Size

1. Take a measuring tape and lay it flat on your skin around your rib cage directly underneath your breasts
2. Make sure the measuring tape is going straight across
3. If you end up with an odd number round up to the next even number
4. That is your band size

Finding your Cup Size

1. Take the measuring tape and wrap it around the fullest part of your bust with your bra on.
2. If your bra is too big or not supporting you, lift the straps so that your bust is where it should be while being measured.
3. Again make sure that the measuring tape lays flat and goes straight across your back and bust.
4. Take the number you get and subtract the band size. Take the difference and See Chart below for your estimated cup size

Now that we know if our bras fit lets discuss wrong bra + Fashion. Different tops require different bra styles and if you’re wearing a bra that’s too small you can end up with that ever so unflattering quadre boob interfering with your super cute outfit and if your bra isn’t supporting you it can actually make the dimensions of your waste appear bigger, visually adding weight to your mid section.

Styles

• Backless Bra – The backless bra is pretty self-explanatory, it has no back. It’s also possible to get a backless bra without straps. The backless bra works extremely well for backless and low back garments. If you’re a fan of off the shoulder tops having one of these will do wonders for your sexii look.

• Convertible Bra – The convertible bra is not only adorable but also very convenient. The straps are interchangeable to turn the bra from standard to a halter to backless to strapless! These nifty straps make the convertible bra a multiple style opportunity

• Demi Bra – The demi bra is mostly about cleavage. It’s design is made to push the breasts towards the center so create a firm showy look. The cup starts about an inch above the nipple so it’s great for low cut tops. 

• Full Cup Bra – The full cup bra is designed for women with larger breasts, it’s purpose is mainly to support. The full cup covers the whole breast in order to fully support and shape.

• Minimizer Bra – The minimizer like the full cup is for women with a larger bust, it’s purpose is to make the bust look smaller and smoother. It can also help prevent button bunching when wearing a blouse or button down.

• Push Up Bra – Unlike the minimizer the push up does just the opposite. The push up is made to give the illusion of bigger breasts it also extenuates the breast form and creates gorgeous cleavage for those sexy tops. 

• Sports Bra – Sports bras were made to reduce bounce during sporty activities, though many women wear them on the regular. Sports bras do not provide enough support to wear day in and day out, they also ware out very easily.

• Strapless Bra – Every femme should own one of these! Not only do they look great with a strapless shirt or off the shoulder sweater but also for evening wear. They really do work wonders.  For the larger breasted women like myself, these bras may be a problem. Unfortunately they don’t make them in my cup size but during prom season I found an awesome gadget called a corset bra. It uses your back and waist to support your breasts allowing you to rock that gorgeous strapless dress or shirt and they are surprisingly comfortable. Any prom or bridal store should have them

• T-Shirt Bra – The T-Shirt bra is designed to provide a smooth appearance under soft and thin materials, such as a T-shirt or sheer top. Very comfortable and sexii especially for the more masculine women. They look great under a polo or wife beater.

Although most women can find bras in any Arie, Victoria Secret or Department store women with an uncommon cup size or have a tiny rib cage with large breasts are going to have a harder time finding the right bra. Most cities have specialty stores specifically for lingerie and carry these bra sizes. Personally I like Blums on Long Island, they not only have large bust bras for girls with small rib cages but they also have specialty bathing suit tops! Do a little internet searching and I’m sure you will find a store that you will love!

Okay so before I end my Boobies rant I just want to give you a tiny tid bit of information on bra maintenance. Bras should really be hand washed and hung up to dry. They’re not cheap so you want them to last as long as possible and that is really the best way. If you do decide to wash them remember to wash on delicate and dry on air other wise you can warp the wires and ruin your perfect boobie holder So be gentle with your bras, have fun trying on and finding your perfect bra fit and remember to be comfortable being you. Please be good to your ta tas!!

Fashion, Express yourself

- KitCat

KitCat

Hey Ladies!

My name is KitCat and let me just start by saying that I am SUPER excited to be the New Fashion Writer for LezGetReal.com! Okay so you’re all probably wondering, who is this Cat? What makes her a fashionista? How can her advice / Column help me? The answer is simple . . . Because I Am AMAZING hee hee just kidding but in all seriousness I should probably tell you a little bit about myself, my personal sense of style and what my plans are for this column before I begin addressing this years do’s and don’ts of the fashion world.

Okay so about me, I am the founder of TheLesbianConfidentials.com as well as a Pre-Vet student. Being a Pre-Vet student I am a broke friendly shopper, who is really good at name brand shopping affordably. A lot of my clothes are from places like Wet Seal, American Eagle, Aeropostale and when I can afford it my hand bags come from Coach. My fashion style tends to be very Elegant, Sophisticated Chic. My expression (as I’m sure you’ve guessed by my word mannerisms) is feminine. My favorite color is pastel pink so I end up wearing at least one article of pink clothing per day. I am a whopping 4 foot 9, Very tall I know hee hee, though my friends say that I am tiny and adorable, a must have.

Being that I am so familiar with the female form , one of my many talents is knowing what style, cuts and colors work well for an individual woman. Whether your self-expression be feminine, masculine or somewhere in between I can help you find clothes, accessories and style that not only fit your personality but extenuate your unique and adorable body. I consider myself to be very well rounded in the fashion world and I’m very familiar with the ins and outs of a wide variety of styles and trends. My specialties are matching up personality with style and then conforming the style to the specific individuals body type. My wonderful perception of shape, vivid imagination and understanding of personality / gender expression make it easy for me to cater to the feminine personality as well as the masculine. It is very important for someone who is giving fashion advice to be brand and style knowledgeable with the eye to match the right clothing to the right body.

Okay so now that you have this little tidbit of information you’re probably wondering how I plan on helping. I have a few ideas, though if you have more I’d love to hear them. First I would like to help people directly, as many as possible. Whether you need a new style, all new wardrobe, you’re confused about the cuts and colors that fit your body, you’re fashionly challenged hee hee or if you just need a second opinion on an outfit for a special day, I am here to give you my undivided attention and unbiased, fashion educated opinion. Feel free to send me pictures and as much info as you can so that I can give you the most accurate opinion possible. Then of course product reviews, hair/make up tutorials, random fashion segments, Dos / don’ts and Ins/outs. Sort of a fashion opinions and advice column

Well as much as I obviously love to ramble on it’s time to bring my first segment to an end. In closing I would like all of you to remember that regardless of style, looks, brand of clothing or gender expression You are all beautiful vibrant women. Let your natural beauty and glowing personalities define who you are, you are beautiful because you are you. Nothing is more beautiful then a confident woman who loves and respects herself. People express themselves through creativity and customization, what better way to show the world who you are and what you’re about then through what you wear.

Fashion, Express yourself

- KitCat

Image by Aleksandr Slyadnev via Flickr

Hey Lezzies, Welcome back to “Ask A Femme.” I’m Natasia and I will be dishing out advice on love, dating, relationships, friendship, career, family and fashion issues. Are your friends tired of trying to come up with the solutions to your problems? Are your friends the problem? Did your mom surprise you with a date with the nice guy at her office? I’m here to help!

Dear Femme,

I’m 23 but I look like I’m no older then 15. Cause of my looks I have trouble attracting older women. I don’t wear makeup and I don’t want to change my appearance for anyone. I like myself and the way I look. Have any advice?

Not Jail Bait!

Hi NJB,

Thanks for writing in! I’m glad that you have confidence in yourself. I would never tell anyone to wear make-up or to change themselves to conform to our society’s definition of feminine. However, I get the sense from your email that you are holding yourself back a little. If you want to get the message across to women that you are of age, some kind of change will have to be made on your end.

Instead of changing your style, why don’t you try upgrading your style? If you love t-shirts, go for ones with a more vintage theme or sexier cut.  Victoria Secret has some great stretchy tanks and tees that look sexy and comfortable. If you love jeans, go for a darker wash and avoid embellishments like butterflies and flowers. Also, avoid clothing in bright, primary colors, those will make you look even younger. Have fun with it! Good Luck, NJB. I hope this helps and keep in touch.  

Dear Femme, 

I’m an Asian lesbian in my 30’s and I’ve been single for almost a year. I can’t seem to find that special woman who I feel physically and emotionally attracted too and who feels the same about me. I was always in a relationship in my 20’s and felt the need to be intimate with someone but in my 30’s. I no longer need to fullfill that sexual need. I also find it harder as I get older to find a partner. I moved to another state for a partner I trusted. But she left me for a man who was her best friend and whom I also believed was my friend. I believe lesbian relationships don’t last and have begun to feel jaded. I don’t like to feel lonely and hate sleeping alone but can’t seem to find a woman that I can feel intimate attracted too and safe with. Please help, thanks.

Azn

Hi Azn,

Thanks for writing in! There is a lot going on here. You have had a bad experience and I’m sorry for that. You placed your trust in the wrong person, changed your life for her and she betrayed you and it sucks. But you need to move on. Being single for a year isn’t the worst thing that can happen to you, it’s not even that long to be single! It seems as though you have already starting thinking about your internal needs and what you want from a partner. I’m going to suggest that you continue to learn about yourself and worry less about not having a partner. Put finding love on hold for a little while, go out and have fun. Don’t stay home and feel sorry for yourself, join a gym, take cooking or art classes, drink your coffee at a café instead of at home. While you are out doing things and learning to love being alone, the right woman will come along. But you won’t meet her if you are at home hiding under the covers and crying over someone who didn’t deserve you.  

Also, you should keep in mind that just because your former love left you for a man, not all women will do that to you. Lesbian relationships change and there is as much drama, betrayal, love, affection and longevity as there is in any relationship, gay or straight. Good Luck, Azn. I hope this helps and keep in touch.  

Have a question for me? Email askafemme@yahoo.com

  O K K I E S (ah-keez’) n.: plural of Okkie, familiar form of Oscar   – When I first arrived in New York City from South Africa, albeit an attorney , my foreign-ness made finding work near impossible.  I moved to Los Angeles and soon found myself running around the City with one of Los Angeles’ most well known celebrity stylists.  As it happens Lauren Landau Hines is my first cousin and I could not be more proud of her achievements.  She scooped me in her protective arms and I was able to help her with Janet Jackson’s Rhythm Nation, working specifically with the late great Cyd Charrise who had a cameo in one of the music videos as well as a few other exciting projects.  Lauren has since honed her skills to fill a gap (no pun intended) -  she found that there was no loose comfortable  stylish clothes for boys.

Although accomplished, Lauren is probably the single most modest person one could meet, never touting her  ‘own horn’ and it’s a big one that should be blasted loudly. There is barely an issue of People, US, OK and other tabloids that does not show a celebrity child wearing one of Lauren’s simple and recognizable  OKKIE designs.  Now Lauren tells her career story in her own words:-

The thread that repeatedly weaves its way through my life and career is, well, literally thread. Actually, it’s the cut, color and fabrication of clothing that are among my most important memories and, later, my influences.

Born in South Africa, I attended a conservative elementary school that required me to wear uniform dress – a blazer, button-down shirt, skirt, hat and tie. Freedom came at the end of the day and on weekends when I donned my favorite outfit: bright yellow cropped palazzo pants paired with a tank top. I can picture the pants clearly; I remember how they felt against my body.  

At 14, my family and I immigrated to Los Angeles, where in High School, freed from a dress code, clothing was a means of self-expression. I used my mom’s idle sewing machine to make my own clothes that broadcast my membership in the artsy crowd. I was really into upholstery fabric in high school, I made an upholstery fabric pajama outfit with gold buttons that I lived in.

After high school, I moved to New York City to attend design school. Soon my school internship turned into a full-time job: I worked as a freelance editorial stylist for Interview, Details and Face, the fashion-forward magazines of the day. My work was heavily influenced by the aesthetic of my favorite designers Issey Miyake, Yohji Yamamoto and Rei Kawakubo, whose clothing lines continue to inspire. These Japanese designers effortlessly reduce fashion to simple sophistication; it is amazing how they delineate colors using a monochromatic color palette. And their designs artfully balance practicality with playfulness, seriousness with humor. Yet their clothes don’t overwhelm, instead they enable the wearer to express his or her own personality. 

In 1987 I returned to LA to broaden my freelance stylist and costume designer career. I created costumes for music videos, concert tours and album covers, adding Janet Jackson, the Rolling Stones and Sting, to my client list. I also collaborated with television and print-ad directors styling and designing costumes for A-List commercial accounts such as Coke, Nike and Visa/MasterCard.

In 2001 I added motherhood to my resume with the birth of Hugo and, later, Oscar – nicknamed Okkie by his big brother. Watching my two young, constantly moving boys was easier than finding boy-appropriate clothing. At that time, girls had many fashion choices, boys much fewer. I struggled to find comfortable, easy-care, hip boys’ wear. Choices seemed locked into a few silhouettes merchandised in standard denims, fleeces and twills, in boy-accepted primary colors.

It was in the limited boys’ wear market that I saw opportunity. In 2005, as a natural next-step in my 20 years experience in the fashion industry, I designed and introduced OKKIES, a line of boys’ pants. With four pant silhouettes merchandised in a variety of fashion-forward colorations and menswear patterns, OKKIES debuted in five stores its first season. By fall 2006, I was designated best new designer by the online children’s clothing expert jamesgirone.com. In October 2008, Earnshaw’s national retail survey named OKKIES one of the top three best-designed collections in the boys’ wear industry. 

I am very excited to introduce my newest lifestyle-designed collection: OKKIES ‘girl’, a full line of feminine, but not frilly, interpretations of OKKIES’ best-selling silhouettes, for fall, 2009.

OKKIES girls’ wear Fall 2009 line features 16 styles in a full line silhouettes – from pants to shirts, dresses to leggings, sweaters, jackets and beanies – for size 3 months to 12 years. OKKIES boys’ wear Fall 2009 line features 19 styles – from pants to shirts, sweaters and hoodies, to beanies also for sizes 3 months to 12 years.

I have created OKKIES as a lifestyle approach to clothing – a lifestyle of ease of wear, clothing that allows them to move, stretch, run, climb and relax without restriction. For parents, that lifestyle is about comfort and more. It’s about clothes that are high-quality; that are wash-and-wear; that are appropriate for a full day of activity, going from a play date to dinner with grandma; that reflect an awareness and appreciation of fashion trends without being fussy or over done; that don’t express ‘generic kid’ but allows an individual’s personality to shine.

Up until now OKKIES have been available in over 500 specialty stores throughout the country, but moving forward, we will be offering our lifestyle approach to clothing directly to our customers on our website.

 Enjoy! go to http://okkies.com/information.php/about-i-1     You can take advantage of the online 48 hour sale – great Holiday Gifts

Posted by Melanie Nathan

 Follow my Twittering  @oblogdeeoblogda

I was in a bikini kill frame of mind—sitting here in my home in the Sonoran Desert, the temperature an ungodly 115 degrees, waiting for the stoned pool boy to show up, fix the pump and clear out the toxic toads, that are now making themselves at home in what is now a toad poop cesspool—all the time kicking myself for not calling the stoned pool girl.

My thoughts were back in the Pacific Northwest—the overly caffeinated land of my birth and epicenter of Riot Grrl –where the mist and rain generally lets up for two weeks a year (present scorcher excepted)– giving a grrl a most brief window of opportunity to sport a bikini.

So when Paula called, suggesting I do a report on the Suicide Girls Swimsuit Edition—nothing could have been finer—being as I was in a bikini kill frame of mind.

For those who have just recently arrived from Mars, I probably should explain that the Suicide Girl thing has nothing to do with the premature termination of life.

It all started when three friends were sitting in a Pacific Northwest coffee shop, as people in the upper left corner of the country always are, discussing, as friends often do, how to get rich off the Internet. And as friends often do, two of them, who were Portland girls Missy and Spooky Suicide, came to the conclusion, as many have before, that the only sure-fire strategy was to show some skin.

It was 2001 –and especially in Portland, Oregon—punk rock and porn were beginning their money-slicked slide into the mainstream. Punk had never been afraid of a little nudity—but the porn industry had never been punk. Conventional Porn favors plastic women and slick images. Spooky and Missy had something else in mind.

Simply put the idea was to show hot punk chicks nekkid. There was nothing else out there like it.

Yes, Suicide Girls is a pay-to-view soft-core porn site, complete with the requisite photos of naked women. But these women look less like balloon-chested big-hairs than like half the audience at a Yeah Yeah Yeahs show. Suicide Girls often sport tattoos, piercings and pink and purple hair. They choose their own poses and backdrops, and they keep blogs in which they post their opinions about music, politics, fashion and even viewers who post.

The SG Girls perform old-fashioned burlesque—punk style. Burlesque has been bumping and grinding away on the indie club circuit for a while. Burlesque, to some, is nothing more than timid stripping. But this recent burlesque boom owes its popularity to punk’s who-cares-what-you-think spirit, Third Wave feminism’s kitschy nostalgia and–thank goodness–a sense of humor The Suicide Girls have been the best and most successful at bringing this entertainment mainstream.

And most significantly over fifty percent of their paying subscribers are women! So it is that there are regular fashion reports—most entertainingly Dirty Laundry—who recently addressed the proper attire for a fashionable punk girl when it is just too darn hot for a pair of PVC short shorts.
The answer of course is the bikini—fun to wear and easy to shed—and to get on the right fashionista track I must recommend the Suicide Girls Swimsuit Edition.

And when the Suicide Girls do it there is often even an element of socially responsible awareness. For example, take this effort to rehabilitate the pirate profession with a black bandanna bikini with white skull detail or the red and purple not-quite-pin-stripe two-piece with Riot Grrl skull and bones rebel girl coochie protector—thats about as close to punk as a bikini can get:

Go take a look at Dirty Laundry’s Suicide Girls Swimsuit Edition runway—you’ll be glad you did.

Bikinis kill.

http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/news/2002/06/53034
profile:
http://img.suicidegirls.com/media/albums/2/20/15202/737425.jpg
cross
http://img.suicidegirls.com/media/albums/2/20/15202/737429.jpg
http://suicidegirls.com/news/culture/23749/Dirty%20Laundry%20Swimsuit%20Edition/
http://www.target.com/Xhilaration-Bandana-Swimwear-Black/dp/B001VEE898/qid=1247694691/ref=br_1_16/186-7752487-3829829?ie=UTF8&node=618280011&search-alias=&frombrowse=1&pricerange=&index=tgt-mf-mv&field-browse=618280011&rank=salesrank&rh=&page=10
bikini kill 210 w and h
http://suicidegirls.com/news/culture/23749/Dirty%20Laundry%20Swimsuit%20Edition/

http://suicidegirls.com/

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00000372H?ie=UTF8&tag=jusagirinshos-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=B00000372H

The notable trend seems to stem from the long tails flowing in the front of your blouse rather than from the back. This is a comfortable look, but also works in classy styles too. Wraps appeal to those lesbians who may be trying to hide that after-baby bulge or maybe even that after-burger bulge. Wrap tops come in tanks, short sleeve or long, but I’ve noticed that these items haven’t filled up too many clothing racks so you’ll have to keep your eyes open if you want to find a nice wrap that is just your style and budget. Wraps are not so much for the butch lesbians, but wraps work well for this lesbian femme so if you’re a feminine lesbian looking for the next trend, wrap tops are definitely it.

]]> http://lezgetreal.com/2009/03/trendspotting-wraps-for-women/feed/ 1 http://lezgetreal.com/2009/01/trendspotting-cute-kids/ http://lezgetreal.com/2009/01/trendspotting-cute-kids/#comments Sun, 18 Jan 2009 05:00:00 +0000 ~Julie Phineas~ http://lezgetreal.com/?p=819 The latest fashion trend isn’t fashionable clothing; it’s fashionable clothing for our children!

Our children are bearing witness to a hopeful time in history. It’s clear to many that the way of the future starts with our children, and you can bet that anti-gay groups are focused on advancing their agenda through their children. Having cute kids is becoming a fashion statement in these crazy times! Just look at these two cuties…

Now the Obama daughters are taking office with their father and mother; which has brought them to the forefront on many levels.

On the level of fashion, many have their eye on what the Obama family has been wearing throughout their campaign for the Presidency, elections, and pre-inauguration. Some have said that Michelle Obama is going to save women’s fashion, but now Malia & Sasha Obama are being called the First Daughters of Fashion. We have all seen children of celebrities gain visibility and set new trends for their ‘fashion sense’; but what we are seeing now is truly a new trend in itself.

Here are some cute outfits for kids, one for a little girl and one for a little boy…

I think my kids would rock these outfits for sure… cute and fashionable children overshadow the fashionable grown-ups in this new world we live in!

Julie Phineas is a work at home mom of 2 who lives in Southern California. You can find out more about her online by visiting her website at www.juliephineas.com.

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As I’ve been out and about getting ready for the holidays, I’ve noticed a trend in teal!

Every winter I find myself changing my look and style as I reach for warm clothes and darker shades. Usually, I wind up with a berry tone as the base of my winter look, as I am biased to browns during the summer. Spring always brings out the color in me, and I was surprised to see teal fabrics popping up more and more on the racks even though it’s winter. Surprisingly, when I picked up some new makeup for holiday looks, I chose a 4 color eyeshadow palette with a a gold base, and teal highlight from Loreal called Out of The Blue. It really was out of the blue for my shopping cart, since I am really really prone to berries and browns.

What I’m finding though is that teal works really well for me, and it works with berry shaded lipsticks and browns too.

I picked up a teal tank too and the color is really working for me, and I’ve noticed it works for others as well. I’ve seen teal in many forms, sweaters, tanks, pantsuits, shoes, accesories. You can bet you’ll see me in teal this winter, what about you?

Julie Phineas is a work at home mom of 2 who lives in Southern California. You can find out more about her online by visiting her website at www.juliephineas.com.

AZ Together sent us out to wonderful North Scottsdale, AZ. The area happens to be Rep. Harry Mitchell (D) district so I was hoping for a good response. The response happened not to be the thing that got my attention. It was what everyone was wearing and carrying that I couldn’t stop noticing.

The first of many occurrences is the “snow boot”:

Now first of all we live in the desert and it was 75 degrees that day, but okay it is a fashion statement and they are in right now, but is it still a statement if worn with shorts and a tank top?

I was in awe over almost every purse that went in and voted and came back out with its owner. From Chanel to Louis to list was endless on the different brands of bags.

 

Jess is from Arizona, is happily married, and is a proud mom of an adorable son. For more about her check out www.2moms2kids.com.

Most experts will tell us our costume choices are not random, even if we think so. And although you might think yours hides you, it’s not entirely true. They say when we choose a costume; we are living a fantasy and trying to show the others a part of our inner selves.

Zombies, vampires, skeletons and other monsters show our fascination with the macabre and grotesque. Fairies or princesses represent one’s lost innocence or beauty, and a return to a safer, simpler time. Animals generally represent strength, basic instincts, with other specific traits for specific creatures.

Case in point… these two…

Yep those costumes pretty much tells it all about them I’d say.

So if you dress like a ho tonight, beware, your costume might be letting some skeletons out of the closet that you didn’t even know you had.

While researching this article, I found just about the best guide out there to what your costume is saying on a site called Club Planet.Com and here is some of what they say your costume is telling everyone….

What Your Halloween Costume Says About You if You’re a Ghost

You’re either cheap, unoriginal, or lazy. If you think that you can throw an old white sheet over your head, cut slits for eyeholes and call it a costume, you’re sadly mistaken. You’re better off staying at home and saving people the tears your mind-numbing personality would cause them.

What Your Halloween Costume Says About You if You’re a Pimp

You’re cashing in on the old trick-or-treating philosophy; the more houses you go to, the more candy you’ll get. A lesson just as important in your 20s as it was when you were 8-years-old.

What Your Halloween Costume Says About You if You’re a Pirate

Fun-loving and adventurous, you aren’t afraid to take risks. You aren’t easily influenced, especially when it comes to people’s opinions about others; you truly believe that there’s a hidden treasure buried within everyone. That, or you’re just lazy and are two years too late to the Captain Jack Sparrow trend.

What Your Halloween Costume Says About You if You’re a Witch

You aren’t afraid to tell people what you think, even if you make some enemies in the process. Those who know you well would say you have a spell-binding personality. (And if those people actually verbalized that joke, they should be shot.)

This year I plan to go as Sarah Palin myself … I bought some Sexy Librarian Glasses, a Palin Power Suit and as you saw from the above picture I had a few Palinesque accessories of my own on hand already, and Debbie is going as my moose. So I wonder what my costume this year says about me?

Oh my, could I secretly want to be an out of touch Republican baby factory?

So what are you going to be tonight?

Paula Brooks lives in the Outer Banks of North Carolina with her partner, their twin daughters and her hearing helper dog, where they own and operate a vacation home rental business. You can visit her Blogger profile here.

As a Professor of Humanities, my day job has taken me on a few archaeological digs in the Middle East and Turkey. These travels also took me to some very unique shops and bazaars. I always loved the local fashions and materials that came from these areas and of course, like any good “digger”, I always wanted an Indy Hat, so I was really taken by some of Ralph Laurens ready to wear Spring 2009 line presented during fashion week in New York last month.

Lauren looked to the Middle East and Indiana Jones for inspirations, with khaki camp, Indiana Jones hats and white linen suits worn with matching shirts and metallic ties. In keeping with his desert theme, linen is defiantly omnipresent in these designs, as was silk, a sandy palette dominates Laurens desert-ready attire with highlights of metallics: bronze, silver, gold, and platinum and Ralph is sure to get a bit of my money next spring.

However I did think some of this line was a bit over the top… The turbans just did not do it for me and I am not really all that sure about the harem pants presented in this line either.

But there is a lot in this line I liked, especially those Indy Hats.

Hmmm I wonder if Ralph is offering a whip and a pistol with this line?

Paula Brooks lives in the Outer Banks of North Carolina with her partner, their twin daughters and her hearing helper dog, where they own and operate a vacation home rental business. You can visit her Blogger profile here.

Well maybe not hundreds, but I do get a few and I try to read them all, but can’t always respond the way I’d like.

This week for some reason I got a bunch of fashion questions about what makes a lesbian surfer mom fashion look.

Now I have no clue why anyone would write me about fashion, because its not a topic that I really feel I have much expertize in.

I also have to wonder why these readers would be interested in a fashion style where they end up looking like a lesbian surf mom.

In my opinion the concepts of Lesbian surf moms and fashion are pretty much oxymoron’s and exclusive of each other as the style tends to have a propensity to incorporate all of the reductive fashion stereotypes of lesbians, surfers and moms but with none of the good elements associated with any of these fashion styles.

To make my point let us look at the term Lesbian Surfer Mom….

The first word in that description is lesbian.

Now when you think lesbian the first thing you have to do think back to the day when everybody was grunge and think flannel shirts.

A way cool look in back 1993 to be sure but not so much anymore because only throw back lesbians and your dad wear flannel shirts today.

Then there is the mandatory hat or do rag bandanna.

There is a story that goes like this… A little girl and her mom were riding on a public bus one day when the little girl saw a woman sporting a bandanna on her head, she asked her mom… ‘Mommy is that lady a pirate?’ And her mommy said ‘no honey she is a lesbian.’

Nuff said there, I think.

Now let look at the word Surfer.

Now I know that the shabby trashy faded and beat up Surf look is in right now but you really have to understand that real surfers came up with that look not out of any sense of fashion but because we tend to spend all of our money on surfboards, wet suits, tickets to rad surf destinations, gas for the 4×4 and beer, leaving no money to buy new clothes.

When we do get new threads they tend to come from surf shops in the form of Surf T-Shirts and from the Army Navy store in the form of cargo pants because they are cheap and will last a long time. Bikini tops have replaced bras because a real surfer girl will think ‘why spend money on bra when I can get something I can wear in and out of the water and not worry about ruining it.’ And the mismatched Bikini tops and bottoms look, well that came about because it was what a real surfer mom happened to have found in her truck when she got to the beach for her surf session.

Take it from me, before Pac Sun came along there was no thought or design put into the surfer girl look.

Finally lets look at the word Mom.

Moms tend hang out with people who look like this most of the time.

I think that picture should just about cover it….

Ok that said, my lesbian surfer mom look is one of applesauce, cereal, snot, milk, vomit and all manner of other mystery substances wiped on my clothes, outfits that don’t even begin to match, no make up and hair that goes un-brushed for days and un-cut for months.

Now after reading this article, and having read how I look, AND you still want to look like a Lesbian Surf Mom, I have to ask…

Are you insane?

I look this way because I have no choice, but if you want to look like this on purpose, I think you really need help and not in the fashion area.

Perhaps Doctor Phil’s site is place you really need to get your advice.

Paula Brooks lives in the Outer Banks of North Carolina with her partner, their twin daughters and her hearing helper dog, where they own and operate a vacation home rental business. You can find more info on her Blogger profile here.